The story, reason and mission. Throwback.

I've just taken another sip... This time it's a red wine - Rioja Crianza. I will be quicker an alcoholic than fashion blogger, if things will still goes that way :) But a glass of nice wine is essential, especially now, when I’m sitting in my small, single room and the weather in London today is quite sad. I lit up my favourite candle. It's nice and cozy. I'm gonna bring up the past now. Let’s go!
Well… actually, It would be easier to leave the past behind, simply say: "Hi, I love fashion," and start blogging, like mostly bloggers do. But what we are now has been the result of our own past actions. We are created by the past. We are here because of a reason. That’s what today's post gonna be about. My past, story. Why this blog exist and what it means to me. Thereby I'll give you a picture of myself from the past, present and the future. 
Finally all this will be a foundation of INNYdrug. 
Get yourself comfy!

 That's how it all started...

 "London - Start to a big careers" – picture from April 2013 issue of Polish Elle magazine. I've seen this exactly a month until I came to the UK. At the time, when I already was thinking about INNYdrug more realistically, and I determined London as my destination. It was like a good sign. It made me think I am on a good way, that London will change my life and makes dreams come true. And that’s one of the reasons I came here for – dreams. It's been exactly a year since then. And INNYdrug exist, in London. 
I made my decision of moving to the UK at the beginning of 2013. Spontaneously. I’m very spontaneous person, by the way. Sometimes it makes my life harder but also more exciting and better.  
I had, until this point, spent the past twenty-one years embodying small town Poland, Lubon which is just under one of the biggest cities in my country - Poznan. Both cities are equal to me and means one - home.
I had quite nice life. Some people would say I've had everything, an easy life. I worked as a manager in a restaurant, surrounded by friends. I had a nice car and only phone bills to pay, cuz I lived with parents. High life! We might think this is a heavenly image of life. You don’t have to struggle for anything: you only live from day to day and  then start over again. Why would you change that? 
Being happy and  independent were always main aspirations in my life. Independence – Such a big, powerful word. It may even seem unreal.  However, I tried to be independent as much as I could. I've worked hard for everything I have since I'm 18.  I don’t take or lend money from anybody.  I've been always responsible for myself and my choices. I never asked for help. I’m learning from my mistakes. I'm always doing whatever I want. Nobody leads me through life. It's just hard when you have to do everything by yourself, alone. But, I think that makes you stronger. I worked mostly as a waiter. I choose hospitality because I thought is the best way for young people,  without goals and specific plans for future, to make quick and good money, by the time they will sort out their life. All along I believed I will leave this industry for good one day and start doing something that I love. I was changing workplace every 3 months, gaining new experience, meeting new people and earning more each time.  When I got bored or I didn’t like it – next restaurant etc. I may say that after 2 years I get to the top. At age of  20, I became to be a manager of whole restaurant. I was so proud and happy at the beginning. I was working longer than 3 months here, a year. And that was my last job in Poland. When I get the opportunity to be a manager, obviously I had to try it. I knew I don’t want to stay forever in hospitality, but I thought maybe this job will bring something interesting to my life, and that is what it does. I understood that I need to change my life!
Job was always for me like a time killer, I was spending more time at work than at home. Sometimes I was even sleeping at work. When my friends were partying, I was working. There’s a lot of things that I missed. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve done many crazy things, too and I know what a good party is. But most of the time work was on the first plan.I know how to safe money. But I am really good ad spending them, too. Each time I’ve had day off, I was getting crazy on shopping. It was just giving me satisfaction, happiness, relax. My wardrobe was growing in front of me and I wast just buying more and more. I worked for clothes. Shopping centre was like a hospital for me. Fashion – my drug. Anyway after a year as a manager, when excitement left the building, I started to live day to day. Everything at the beginning is new, exciting and then its gets normal, boring. Everyday is the same… I felt like I waisted my time, life. I need something that will keep me moving forward, something creative, exciting, with new stuff coming up all the time. I need to live! As a manager of restaurant I was focus more on what to wear for the next day, rather than the business. Something was wrong here, right?  Money is important but I am not getting any younger and I need to start doing things that I love. I realised that I need to get out from hospitality. I was not 18 anymore.  I was  unhappy.  Two specific things were missing in my life:  A goal and passion. Few of us know that a life without goals means sacrificing the thing we probably want most: happiness. Few, because a lot of people have no goals. But each of us is responsible for ourselves. I know I live once. I want to spend my life happy and this monotony was killing me! That’s why I wanted to change my life. Straight away.
But I still had no idea what I wanted to do in life. How to set up a goal then? I was always busy with something and I just didn't think about such things. What can a fashion victim do? All I knew was I love fashion. And I think Fashion Industry will fit perfectly a person like me. Actually, people around me always told me that.
I started thinking about university. When you want to study fashion, there's only one destination – London, one of the most fashionable cities on this planet! I had no idea what to study and  how it all works in the UK. I tried to find out something via internet but there’s nothing better than just go and see, I thought. That’s also how idea about blogging appear to my mind. Actually, It was somewhere in my head before, but at this point, I started to think more realistically about it. I did some sketches, ideas. I said to myself: I’ll do it. That was my goal. I knew that I must be more interested in fashion and  improve my knowledge. I think there’s nothing better than blogging about fashion then. It will keep me going and motivate me. I’ll express myself and I’ll learn a lot. I’ll be a part of this world. And what’s very important, I hope I get to know people who are in love with fashion, too. Blog is like your own zone. You can say, do or show whatever you want. Independence and Freedom. If only blogging was my job! That’s my dream. That’s the reason why I made INNYdrug. But It took me a lot of time… 

I came to the UK exactly at April 5th, 2013 at 7:25 at age of 21 with 3 suitcases fully packet with all brand new clothes. I left everything behind me. I came to England to be completely independent, change myself a bit (take care of my body and lifestyle) and try to determine the path of my life. I came here for dreams. I knew its gonna be hard. Beginnings are always hard. And I was not wrong. Life abroad is like having a 2nd life. The only thing that doesn't change is yourself, what’s in your mind. I had to take some time to stand up on my feet. I had to get to know with British reality. Well… I had to learn a lot about life.
At the very beginning I went to Potters Bar, which is a town just on the top of London, to my friend. But after a month I was alone anyway. Actually from April to December everything was the same. It was hard. Working all the time. Mostly 7days a week. At some point I’ve had 2 jobs. Still hospitality. During those 8 months I was living in 4 different houses, dealing and struggling with idiots and horrendous people. I was living day to day but keeping in mind the reason I am here. Slowly I was doing things I wanted to. I lost some weight and I quit smoking. That was big. I was very proud of myself. Some things needs time. Then I had to get out from this small town and move closer to central London.
I made my decision at December 11^thand at 17^th I was sleeping in London for the first time. I left everything behind and decided to move forward. I spent Christmas with friends. First time apart from family. It was weird, different. At New year’s Eve I was alone. I stood on the edge of the wall surrounding the River Thames, staring big fireworks show on London Eye. Behind me, hundred thousands of people were screaming and I was crying and smiling. 2013 was over. 
I said to myself that 2014r will be a big year. Special, funny and happy. I was in the right place finally.
I found a job in London very quickly. I went with my CV to a place that I would never thought I may get a job there. But I did. In one of the best restaurants in the city. Here I saw how a real restaurant look like. Passionate, nice people, great location, beautiful place, rich and posh customers.About a week ago was my last day there. I gave my resignation with heavy hart, but this place was pushing me very into hospitality and I want to go in the opposite way. 
I have another job already. INNYdrug.blogspot.co.uk :) Just kidding. I will have to find some job soon. I have to live somehow.

Wow... It was hard to write all of this and again go back to some situations. I don’t want to write an autobiography here. I did it mostly for myself. To remember about where I am from and why I am here for. And for you to understand me more. Now I’m wondering if anybody will ever read it all apart from me.

 Its been a year today. On the whole, it was a good year anyway. I’ve learned a lot. Like never before. I've achieved more that I would've thought. I've changed my lifestyle and habits for better. It was just a tough year though. I don't regret the day I put my body in a plane that brought me to England.
Today I am happy. I am more independent than year ago. I live in London and I've started doing my blog. I'm stronger and wiser. The worse is behind me, I hope :)
I know that next year I will be far away from here. But still in London. I will do what I love, with passion, hopefully I will only dine in restaurants. Let’s just move forward!  

There will be just pure fashion now! 
Lots of  LOVE! :*